10 Online Dating Tips That You Need to Know
Whether you are new to online dating or have been on the apps for years, there is a reason why your profile is still active. The swiping part is simple, making a true connection is a lot more difficult.
There is a science behind online dating but is that really how you want to approach it? Setting unrealistic standards and expectations only sets you up for disappointment.
The best way to handle online dating is to have with it yet stick to the unwritten rules of digital engagement. Yes, there are a few do’s and don’ts and you should know what they are to increase the messages in your inbox.
These are the essential online dating tips and advice you need to know for the next time you login.
1. Know What You are Looking For
The internet is a weird and wonderful place where you can literally find anything. However, it is easy to get lost in the noise if you don’t know what you are really looking for.
Before signing up for an online dating site or downloading a dating app, think about what you want to get out of it. Some platforms are simply more oriented towards hookup culture while others are full of members looking for a long-term serious relationship.
Choose the one that best matches your current needs and desires. If you are open to every possibility, sign up for app and dating sites that are more interactive i.e. a lot of messaging. Messaging first helps you decide whether the person is a one-night-stand or has boyfriend/girlfriend potential.
2. Don't Narrow Down the Options too Much
Some dating sites have the advantage of extensive search options. Although these filters are necessary when there are thousands of profiles available, you shouldn’t cling to them, either.
You might get excited about being able to narrow down the search to match all your criteria for an ideal partner but this does take away from the dating experience. Filtering the profiles too much makes the experience feel more clinical. Leave some space for serendipity.
Similarly, don’t set the bar at an impossible level. You should definitely have standards and know what your dealbreakers are but you never know when someone unexpected finds their way to your heart.
3. Be Clear on Your Profile
Your dating profile is the first thing people so make sure it communicates exactly what you want. Be clear from the very beginning what you are looking for and what they can expect to avoid unwanted messages and disappointments.
So, if you are only into casual dating - add that to your profile. If you are looking for your future life partner - describe them.
It’s not necessary to type a complete list of requirements but just be honest about your intentions. There is already enough chance of miscommunication online so don’t make things even more unclear.
4. Keep it Short & Sweet
Although an empty bio quickly gets clicked away, a complete biography is not attractive either. Your bio should contain all the basic information but not feel like an essay.
It is also good to add in a few short descriptions, whenever the website or app allows. There is no need to go into incredible detail but give enough that your admirers have something to ask you about.
Avoid the cliches, people that go through enough profiles get tired of reading the same thing over and over again. Humor always works well so if you can slip in a joke you are doing excellent.
5. Choose the Right Photos
Whether we like to admit it or not, the eye wanders to the photo first. Some don’t even bother reading the bio if the photos are not interesting enough.
The profile photo be a natural shot and without anyone else in it. Singles look for a kind and trustworthy face and those characteristics don’t come out on a forced or excessively staged photo.
As for the additional photos, show different aspects of your life. This clues them in on how you spend your time and what your priorities are. That is vital information for making a connection.
Be wary of adding group photos, though. It confuses people and can make it seem like you are less confident. If you do include group shots, do it at the end so they can recognize you among the crowd.
6. Don't be Shy
There is no time for being shy when online dating. Plus, you already have a screen to hide behind if it doesn’t go as planned.
Don’t be afraid to be the first to send a message. It shows confidence and genuine interest.
It is not necessary to start with a pickup line, in fact, those can easily backfire. The best ice breaker is just a simple hello and maybe a kind comment about one of their photos or bio text.
7. Don't Sell Yourself Too Hard
There is no need to make yourself seem like anything that you are not. This will only make things awkward by the time you actually go on a date.
Be yourself, voice your honest opinions and just see how they react. If they are not feeling it during the messaging there probably won’t be a spark on a real life date, either.
Don’t hype yourself up in the hopes of seeming more cool. They don’t know how you are saying it so it could come across as arrogant.
8. It's a Marathon, Not a Sprint
The messaging stage is still casual. When you just start messaging someone it is not the time to rush things, tell your whole life story or bombard them with non-stop questions.
Take your time to think of a reply and give them the time to reply, too. Don’t let a few minutes or even a few hours of silence discourage you. They are probably just busy, no need to panic.
Keep things light and positive. You don’t want to get into a heavy debate and you don’t want to make it feel like you are picking on them.
9. Trust Your Instinct
Let’s be honest, not every dating profile is kosher. Unfortunately, there is a chance of running into a fake account or someone with less than kind intentions.
So, if you notice anything that just seems ‘off’, there might be something unsavoury going on. Stop communication and move on to the next one.
The same goes for your first date. Always meet in a public space and don’t exchange phone numbers or addresses until you feel completely safe to do so.
Learn about the online dating red flags and keep your eye out for them.
10. Test the Chemistry
We are so used to texting that we forget about other forms of communication. However, when you are getting to know someone for the first time, messaging only tells you so much.
You won’t know if there truly is chemistry until you actually meet each other. So, go ahead and plan that date!
If you have been messaging someone that lives far away this is more difficult to plan, though. The next best thing is a phone call or a video chat.